VII
AN ASSEMBLY IN PARADISE
(Continuation and End)
St. Catherine entered the assembly, her head encircled by a crown of
emeralds, sapphires, and pearls, and she was clad in a robe of cloth of gold.
She carried at her side a blazing wheel, the image of the one whose fragments
had struck her persecutors.
The Lord having invited her to speak, she expressed herself in these terms:
"Lord, in order to solve the problem you deign to submit to me I shall not
study the habits of animals in general nor those of birds in particular. I shall
only remark to the doctors, confessors, and pontiffs gathered in this assembly
that the separation between man and animal is not complete since there are
monsters who proceed from both. Such are chimeras—half nymphs and half serpents;
such are the three Gorgons and the Capripeds; such are the Scyllas and the
Sirens who sing in the sea. These have a woman's breast and a fish's tail. Such
also are the Centaurs, men down to the waist and the remainder horses. They are
a noble race of monsters. One of them, as you know, was able, guided by the
light of reason alone, to direct his steps towards eternal blessedness, and you
sometimes see his heroic bosom prancing on the clouds. Chiron, the Centaur,
deserved for his works on the earth to share the abode of the blessed; he it was
who gave Achilles his education; and that young hero, when he left the Centaur's
hands, lived for two years, dressed as a young girl, among the daughters of King
Lycomedes. He shared their games and their bed without allowing any suspicion to
arise that he was not a young virgin like them. Chiron, who taught him such good
morals, is, with the Emperor Trajan, the only righteous man who obtained
celestial glory by following the law of nature. And yet he was but half human.
"I think I have proved by this example that, to reach eternal blessedness, it
is enough to possess some parts of humanity, always on the condition that they
are noble. And what Chiron, the Centaur, could obtain without having been
regenerated by baptism, would not the penguins deserve too, if they became half
penguins and half men? That is why, Lord, I entreat you to give old Mael's
penguins a human head and breast so that they can praise you worthily. And grant
them also an immortal soul—but one of small size."
Thus Catherine spoke, and the fathers, doctors, confessors, and pontiffs
heard her with a murmur of approbation.
But St. Anthony, the Hermit, arose and stretching two red and knotty arms
towards the Most High:
"Do not so, O Lord God," he cried, "in the name of your holy Paraclete, do
not so!"
He spoke with such vehemence that his long white beard shook on his chin like
the empty nose-bag of a hungry horse.
"Lord, do not so. Birds with human heads exist already. St. Catherine has
told us nothing new."
"The imagination groups and compares; it never creates," replied St.
Catherine drily.
"They exist already," continued St. Antony, who would listen to nothing.
"They are called harpies, and they are the most obscene animals in creation. One
day as I was having supper in the desert with the Abbot St. Paul, I placed the
table outside my cabin under an old sycamore tree. The harpies came and sat in
its branches; they deafened us with their shrill cries and cast their excrement
over all our food. The clamour of the monsters prevented me from listening to
the teaching of the Abbot St. Paul, and we ate birds' dung with our bread and
lettuces. Lord, it is impossible to believe that harpies could give thee worthy
praise.
"Truly in my temptations I have seen many hybrid beings, not only
women-serpents and women-fishes, but beings still more confusedly formed such as
men whose bodies were made out of a pot, a bell, a clock, a cupboard full of
food and crockery, or even out of a house with doors and windows through which
people engaged in their domestic tasks could be seen. Eternity would not suffice
were I to describe all the monsters that assailed me in my solitude, from whales
rigged like ships to a shower of red insects which changed the water of my
fountain into blood. But none were as disgusting as the harpies whose offal
polluted the leaves of my sycamore."
"Harpies," observed Lactantius, "are female Monsters with birds' bodies. They
have a woman's head and breast. Their forwardness, their shamelessness, and
their obscenity proceed from their female nature as the poet Virgil demonstrated
in his 'Aeneid.' They share the curse of Eve."
"Let us not speak of the curse of Eve," said the Lord. "The second Eve has
redeemed the first."
Paul Orosius, the author of a universal history that Bossuet was to imitate
in later years, arose and prayed to the Lord:
"Lord, hear my prayer and Anthony's. Do not make any more monsters like the
Centaurs, Sirens, and Fauns, whom the Greeks, those collectors of fables, loved.
You will derive no satisfaction from them. Those species of monsters have pagan
inclinations and their double nature does not dispose them to purity of morals."
The bland Lactantius replied in these terms:
"He who has just spoken is assuredly the best historian in Paradise, for
Herodotus, Thucydides, Polybius, Livy, Velleius Paterculus, Cornelius Nepos,
Suetonius, Manetho, Diodorus Siculus, Dion Cassius, and Lampridius are deprived
of the sight of God, and Tacitus suffers in hell the torments that are reserved
for blasphemers. But Paul Orosius does not know heaven as well as he knows the
earth, for he does not seem to bear in mind that the angels, who proceed from
man and bird, are purity itself."
"We are wandering," said the Eternal. "What have we to do with all those
centaurs, harpies, and angels? We have to deal with penguins."
"You have spoken to the point, Lord," said the chief of the fifty doctors,
who, during their mortal life had been confounded by the Virgin of Alexandria,
"and I dare express the opinion that, in order to put an end to the scandal by
which heaven is now stirred, old Mael's penguins should, as St. Catherine who
confounded us has proposed, be given half of a human body with an eternal soul
proportioned to that half."
At this speech there arose in the assembly a great noise of private
conversations and disputes of the doctors. The Greek fathers argued with the
Latins concerning the substance, nature, and dimensions of the soul that should
be given to the penguins.
"Confessors and pontiffs," exclaimed the Lord, "do not imitate the conclaves
and synods of the earth. And do not bring into the Church Triumphant those
violences that trouble the Church Militant. For it is but too true that in all
the councils held under the inspiration of my spirit, in Europe, in Asia, and in
Africa, fathers have torn the beards and scratched the eyes of other fathers.
Nevertheless they were infallible, for I was with them."
Order being restored, old Hermas arose and slowly uttered these words:
"I will praise you, Lord, for that you caused my mother, Saphira, to be born
amidst your people, in the days when the dew of heaven refreshed the earth which
was in travail with its Saviour. And will praise you, Lord, for having granted
to me to see with my mortal eyes the Apostles of your divine Son. And I will
speak in this illustrious assembly because you have willed that truth should
proceed out of the mouths of the humble, and I will say: 'Change these penguins
to men. It is the only determination conformable to your justice and your
mercy.'"
Several doctors asked permission to speak, others began to do so. No one
listened, and all the confessors were tumultuously shaking their palms and their
crowns.
The Lord, by a gesture of his right hand, appeased the quarrels of his elect.
"Let us not deliberate any longer," said he. "The opinion broached by gentle
old Hermas is the only one conformable to my eternal designs. These birds will
be changed into men. I foresee in this several disadvantages. Many of those men
will commit sins they would not have committed as penguins. Truly their fate
through this change will be far less enviable than if they had been without this
baptism and this incorporation into the family of Abraham. But my foreknowledge
must not encroach upon their free will.
"In order not to impair human liberty, I will be ignorant of what I know, I
will thicken upon my eyes the veils I have pierced, and in my blind
clearsightedness I will let myself be surprised by what I have foreseen."
And immediately calling the archangel Raphael:
"Go and find the holy Mael," said he to him; "inform him of his mistake and
tell him, armed with my Name, to change these penguins into men."
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